This is Why We Don't Feed Whiskey to the Dead Drunk Uncles, Either

Misconceptions in Ancestor Work and Veneration

The Shipwreck Author: Rowlandson, Thomas 1815 Access: October 9, 2024 | Old Book Illustrations

Greetings Curious Spirits!

It’s the spooky season, and my clients still bring the woo!

I've had the following conversation about a half-dozen times last year. My client is struggling with a spiritual logjam. Everything they try seems to make the problem worse. Salvia apiana has limits. The spirit world is far more diverse than assumed. When it comes to magickal solutions, too many cooks are a risk. We agree to remove a few cooks.

Then it comes out: my client got told to offer alcohol to an ancestor remembered for their inebriated violence. The poltergeist pandemonium flies.

I ask, "Is there a history of congenital alcoholism in your family?"

Every time so far, the answer to the question has been yes.

There's a lot to unpack here. Before I paywall the nitty gritty, here is what I would like to see become common knowledge:

When you ask your ancestors to assist you, ask for the healed and whole ones to come forward. I learned this from a Yuma practitioner who helped me out of my mess many years ago. What they showed me held up, and it improved my situation. I even started sleeping again three nights out of seven! That made for a big step up from the zero I had achieved the two years prior.

Ancestors are still a type of Spirit. Like many people, they can take ideas in several different ways. A Minneapolis-based TikTok creator, Auntie J, recommends asking spirits and Spirits, in general, to help things happen in a "good way." My lived experience shows me that the practice works.

Three out of the four people I've learned from on these things about ancestor work are North American indigenous folk. It's like that particular group knows a thing or ten about generational trauma and the painful distortions likely to happen if you're not careful. Huh.

Here are the bullet points that I'll be detailing behind the paywall:

• Death and "oops, there IS an afterlife " do not automatically bring wisdom and enlightenment. I'll be talking next week about psychopomp work and why there are multiple practices for moving human spirits on because of that. Your ancestors don't suddenly know better than they did just because they moved on. We've seen how hard people hang on to beliefs because too many facts and beliefs are not connected in their minds.

• Addictions can continue after death. Most addictions come about as a misdirection for dealing with pain. The pain of life isn't limited to the pain of the body. People can and do die without resolving their inner-world traumas. If they use substances to medicate their inner world, that will continue to be a problem.

• Our ancestors are not always on our side.

Patriarchy hurts everyone.

• It is NOT our job to do our ancestor's healing for them. Ancestral healing is a tandem, collaborative practice between the descendants and ancestors. Everyone involved has to commit and buy in, and cooperation can sometimes take work. It is normal to need healthy ancestors to intercede with unhealthy ones.

• You do not need to know the names of your ancestors to work with them. You don't even need to know their nationality or geographic origins. As you work with your ancestors, your needs will come to you.

Do you have questions about your ancestors? Book an appointment with me. I have ten slots open for the remaining month.

Just a reminder, Curious Spirits - if you subscribe to The Spirited Witch Patreon at the $10 and up level, a subscription to my Substack comes free with that membership! Also, if you have not checked out Golden Apple Metaphysical lately, we've got some good stuff up in the shop and on the blogs!